Daphne, Dressing Up, and Parenting Online

Parenting is hard enough. Taking it to the Web? That's a whole different can o' worms.

A Missouri mom's recent post about her 5-year-old son's Halloween costume has drawn a tremendous response from parents and others -- and not just for his choice in being Daphne from Scooby Doo.

On her blog Nerdy Apple Bottom, the Mo Mom wrote,

"If you think that me allowing my son to be a female character for Halloween is somehow going to ‘make’ him gay then you are an idiot. Firstly, what a ridiculous concept. Secondly, if my son is gay, OK. I will love him no less. Thirdly, I am not worried that your son will grow up to be an actual ninja so back off."

The post, which features a photo of her son in his bright orange and purple costume complete with pink boots, has gone viral, generating over a million hits and more than 38,000 comments. Mom was interviewed by phone on CNN’s “American Morning,” saying she and her husband were “flabbergasted” by the response.

Various media outlets have now weighed in, not to mention all the mothers and others with strong opinions.

Salon's Mary Elizabeth Williams hilariously addresses the mom's post, saying "This is how it's done, folks."

"It should be a no-brainer that 5-year-old boy who dresses like Daphne one day a year is not automatically gay or transgendered -- although obviously, if he had wanted to be Velma, he'd be a lesbian. The point is, as the mom blogger beautifully expresses it, so what?. . ."

But Carline Howard over at Forbes.com isn't so supportive.

"Her anger at the mean mommies is valid. But she’s taken to the blogosphere with her rants (people can be mean, even to children! traditional gender distinctions aren’t fair!) and his photo at the expense of her “worrier” son’s privacy."

This entire kerfuffle reminds me of a children's picture book called "King & King" (Tricycle Press, 2002) that was attacked for "promoting a gay agenda" and sexualizing characters for children. But what the book boils down to for me is less about homosexuality than about teaching tolerance. Buy it now.

I agree with Nerdy Apple Bottom that her son did "rock that wig." And obviously her post struck a chord across the country. So while many of us support the notion that "it takes a village," this Missouri Mom seems to have gotten a much larger village than she ever dreamed possible.